Garbage Pail Kid Of The Week - Jay Decay

This week's Garbage Pail Kid is a rotting little fella, "Jay Decay".

Like a good/bad slasher film from the 1980's, our little undead friend here rises from the grave. I like the missing eyeball and the fact that part of his jaw is exposed. His hair is surprisingly intact too. There's not too much else going on here other than a very bright moon.

Oh well, here's to you Jay Decay.

The History Of Movies From A to Z - "500 Days Of Summer"

Where I bought this movie: The last gasp of my used movie buying before reality set in and I realized I should be saving discretionary income for things like retirement and not movies that I will ever see unless I start a blog about trying to watch every single DVD in my collection.

* Why Own It?: 500 Days Of Summer was a critics darling in the summer of 2009. Since my wife and I have WILDLY different tastes in movies (“Darling how about we watch Alien Resurrection tonight?...no? wha? You want to watch “The Holiday” again???”….these are why Man Caves are vital in every household), it was a rare opportunity to watch a movie together.

* Had I seen this movie before?: Once, in the winter of 2009 when it first came out in the above mentioned scenario. I will tell you, I had to pull my own teeth to watch it again. Not because it’s a bad movie (I love it actually) but mainly because it’s a hard movie to watch by yourself.




* Time collecting dust: One of my more recent purchases…about 22 months.

* What I thought of the movie: I can’t recommend this movie enough. A perfect date movie that has a lot of great situations that both guys and girls can relate to. What makes the movie though is how it’s constructed. It’s literally about a 500 day relationship and it skips around different days in that relationship. So in one scene, you’re seeing two people falling in love and in the next, they’re at the relationship’s bitter end, then they're back in love again. Who really remembers past relationships in chronological order anyway? Usually its either good or bad memories at certain points in the relationship. There’s also clever editing tricks and film making ideas I had never seen before that were really neat.




And the cast: The cast is really just two people…Zooey Deschanel (of the new TV Show “New Girl”) and Joseph Gordon Levitt (who I couldn’t stand in “3rd Rock Of The Sun” when he was a kid but who I loved in this movie, “Inception”, and of course “G.I. Joe”. Other than that, there are really no familiar names though the little sister of Gordon-Levitt’s character is sort of a semi-rising star in movies like “Kick-Ass” and “Let Me In”. Other than that, its character actor city...unless you count a random appearance by the great Han Solo.




Recommended?: Yes, a must see…but again, see it with someone you love…or at someone who’s pants you want to get into.

Favorite Scenes: There are a lot of good ones. A few that stand out are 1.) The “You Make My Dreams” montage where everyone is dancing through Central Park (trust me, its not ax corny as it reads). 2.) The similar yet very different montages between the two characters and the little things they do to show they are, at first falling in love, and later can’t stand each other. 3.) My favorite scene has to be the one where the guy goes to the party to try and get the girl back. It’s shown via split screen and on the left you see what he expects to happen and on the right side you see what actually happens…one of my favorite scenes of the past few years, just brilliant.






Cut the BS about the movie, I just want to know if there is any nudity: Sadly none...not even a Zooey sideboob.

Previous Movie: 40 Year Old Virgin
Next Movie: A.I (Artificial Intelligence)

Birthdays...

Ah yes, the birthday. Today, I turn 34 years old and each birthday I have seems to matter less and less. However, each birthday my friends and family have seem to matter more and more. Anyway, here’s how I consider the various emotions as birthdays continue to pass by:

Birth – 4 years old: Nobody remembers their birthdays at this age yet these are the birthdays where you get the greatest amounts of toys...and yet all of them are rendered obsolete by the time you’re 5 or 6. I mean, does a 6 year old play with a stuffed animal, a random Bob The Builder Truck, or a Dora The Explorer Coloring Book?



5 years old – 12 years old: The peak of toy gluttony. As a child’s ADD increases throughout childhood, so does the need to get “the hot toy of the moment”. This age is important because kids can now verbalize the gifts they want for their birthday and see it has a free handout from Grandma and Grandpa and Uncle Ned and Aunt Ellen. Kids from your class that you never will be friends with past grade school are obligated to bring a gift if invited to your lame ass roller skating party (almost like a wedding!!!).

A smart 10 year old would say, “In lieu of getting me the new Madden game, how about a $50 contribution to a 529 plan for my large college debt I’m going to have when I’m 22 years old?”



13 years old – 16 years old – The best gift at this age is just cold hard cash.

17 years old – I WANT A CAR!!!

18 years old – 20 years old: With most people in college at this age things start to happen. Cash is still king but the checks you used to get from various relatives may dwindle due to indifference by said relative or sadly the death of the relative. Therefore it becomes most important to maximize the gifts you get.

21 years old: GOOD GOD I AM AN ADULT!!! LET’S GO TO THE LOCAL BAR AND DO 21 SHOTS OF JAEGER!!!



22 years old - 24 years old: These are the most fun birthdays in that the early 20’s are usually the best time of your life in terms of partying and solidifying your lifelong friend base. By this point gifts are usually in the form of a card or a bottle of liquor.

25 years old: Car insurance rates drop for most people this age (YAAAAY!!!) but you begin to have your first quarter-life crisis (WHERE ARE MY MEDS?!?).

26 years old – 29 years old: Things begin to change here. Birthdays now might be spent with your recently married friends who like to be in bed by 11pm but mixed in with your single friends who can still party until 4am. You begin to see the separation from the adult to the young adult.

30 years old: The biggest birthday since turning 21 if only because 30 starts to feel old. From a professional standpoint though, getting into your 30’s means you have something of a career going and hopefully a halfway decent resume.

31 years old to 39 years old: More low key birthdays with friends…maybe a night of bowling or karaoke. The prime of your life.

40 years old: “Life Begins at 40”…right? Probably the last big blowout birthday with friends where you can really push it and party until 2am…that is, assuming you have a babysitter for your kids.



41 years old – 49 years old – Birthdays here are reduced to a night out with one, maybe two couples. Physical ailments may seem to set in…the achy back, the creaky knee, and the old “where did THAT hair come from? That doesn’t belong there!”

50 years old: - Ah yes, the big family gathering. Chances are the kids are almost grown up and it’s always good to have that good old fashioned family dinner. Often a surprise, though with most surprises today, they are not easy to pull off in today’s high tech world.

51 years old – 59 years old: Any birthday beyond this point probably aren’t too much fun and it’s always exacerbated by that wise guy friend who sends you the “another year older? Uh-oh!” birthday card.

59 and half years old: An interesting age in that while this is no party, all of your retirement assets are free to take out without any penalties…this is a good thing.

60 years old: A tender birthday. Once again the family gets together. Maybe Jimmy flies in from Oregon as a surprise or Sally drives all the way up from North Carolina to make sure she doesn’t miss the big day. Gifts are now bought at the “Things Remembered” store and often involve framed pictures.




61 years old – 69 years old: This is where the wheels begin to fall off healthwise although chances are you are retired and if lucky, have a ton of time and money to travel the world and do all of those things you wished you could do in your 20’s (no money) and 30’s and 40’s (damn job….damn kids). Birthdays are now just relegated to going out with the spouse, any local family members, and another couple.

70 years old: AKA the big family reunion birthday. Now you not only have your kids, but your grandkids too. A potential gift is a cruise with other seniors.

71 years old – 79 years old: More health problems persist and sadly your friends begin to pass one. Each birthday is just another year towards joining them. But at least Chili’s gives you a free birthday appetizer if you show them your drivers license.

80 years old: A birthday to reflect. Usually held quietly at a function hall. Here, you usually invite not just family, but any surviving friends. Enjoy your night, as it may be the last time you see all of these people in one room together again…at least until your funeral.



81 Years old to 89 years old: Enjoying the sunset years the best you can. More friends pass away as your go to more funerals than birthday parties. You recognize more names from the obituary section. A nice time to reflect and if one wishes to, write their memoirs to leave as a legacy.

90 years old: The last hurrah. Now you might have four generations of family members surrounding you…IN YOUR ASSISTED LIVING RESIDENCE.

91 years old to 99 years old: Now you’re just taking it day by day and each birthday is a wonder to your family. A birthday present is now in the form of phone call as you listen to Cats In The Cradle one hundred times a day and gently weep.

100 years old: Willard Scott puts your picture up on the Today Show and your life is now totally complete.





Or is it...

Feel Good Friday Music Video

Here's a classic from the 1970's to push you off into the weekend...