Dancing With The Stars Cast

Let's take a closer look at this season's Dancing With The Stars cast. I'm judging them by their relevancy, both past and present, and if I have any interest in watching them dance. In no particular order.

1.) Susan Lucci - I had a crush on her in junior high when I got bronchitis and started watching "All My Children" because nothing else was on during the day. She was also in some sexy TV movies too playing the temptress or the precursor of a MILF today. I guess she is still relevant today and it will get a lot of middle aged women to watch. I look forward to seeing her. She wears a lot of makeup I bet now and her face has been pulled back more than Eddie Guardado on the waiver wire.

2.) Toni Braxton - I also had a crush on her in early high school when she was popular. Had a couple of cool songs I liked ("Another Sad Love Song") and a few I didn't like ("Breath Again"). I bet she still looks good and that's the only reason I'd be interested in watching her perform. If she's hit the wall, then forget it.

3.) Lance Bass - I did not have a crush on Lance Bass when he was popular. I'm sure he's going to do well since he made a career out of being a dancer in N'Sync. To me, he'll always be the guy who tried to launch himself into space. I have a little bit of interest in seeing how he does since he's barely still relevant (see Tropic Thunder) and it will be interesting to see shots of his boyfriend applauding in the crowd.

4.) Cloris Leachman - Yes! You might not know her face but she's been in a ton of movies over the years including a personal favorite "Beerfest". For anyone under 30, she's best known as the woman who replaced Mrs. Garrett on "The Facts Of Life". She's almost 80 years old and it will be interesting to see who dances with her. I'm sure who ever gets paired with her is going to be pissed off. I'm excited to see her.

5.) Kim Kardashian - Well, I guess you need somebody to bring in the MTV crowd. I'm not sure what she's done in life other than pose in Playboy and have Bruce Jenner as a father-in-law. I definitely am married after reading that last statement because if I was 17 years old, she would be the one I'd be most, ahem, "excited" about watching dance around. It should be interesting to see who she gets paired with...maybe the young blond guy who ended up with Shannon Elizabeth last year.

6.) Ted McGinley - Ted McGinely is a like an old friend from high school. He pops up from time to time and when you see him, its like nothing has changed much. Most famous for his role in "Revenge Of The Nerds" and later on playing the guy who replaced Steve in "Married With Children", it should be interesting to see how he does. He seems to be like the Steve Guttenberg of last season.

7.) Brooke Burke - She was pretty hot in the 90's though I don't think I've seen any pictures of her in at least a few years. She was always on random infomercials and hosted that show "Wild on E" which was a precursor to "Girls Gone Wild". Anyway, I bet she's jealous of Kim Kardashian since that's who she pretty much was 10 years ago.

8.) Warren Sapp - Ugh, this should be interesting. I never liked this guy (probably because he was at Miami while I was at Boston College) and he showboats a bit too much. He probably couldn't get a job as a broadcaster so he latched onto this to keep his name in the spotlight. Good luck making it past week 4.

9.) Misty May-Treanor - This works out good for her since she just won the beach volleyball gold medal in the 2008 Olympics. She's the dark haired of the two players. She might do very well since she's the most relevant person on the show right now since she's had the most recent success. I couldn't tell you if she was good looking or not although she must have a good enough body to wear the skimpy outfits they had in Beijing.

10.) Maurice Greene - I know he's a track star who won some medals in the Olympics. I have NO idea what he's been up to since then. He's the kind of guy that could steal this thing though.

11.) Rocco DiSpirito - A washed up reality TV star who is still clinging to his 15 seconds of fame. Not sure if he still runs any of his restaurants, his best hope is to get paired up with the hot blond girl, Julianne Hough.

12.) Cody Linley - I have no idea who this person is except for the fact that he/she is from the Hannah Montana. I'm assuming this a guy but I'm not 100% sure.

13.) Jeffrey Ross - This guy is pretty funny, I've seen him do those celebrity roasts. I have a feeling though his humor won't translate well over to 50 year old women that watch this show. He's the Adam Corolla from last year and will need his humor to carry him through a few weeks.

That's it! My random prediction of the top 3 are Ted McGinley, Misty May-Treanor, and Maurice Greene. We'll see what happens